CONAN
Conan O'Brien
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CONAN
منذ يومين
God is looking down on humans right now thinking, “Damn. Maybe I should try dinosaurs again?”

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منذ يومين
This is my Commencement Speech to the Harvard Class of 2020. Unlike college, it's short and free. https://t.co/JrRyFX0mkG

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منذ يومين
Cats can’t spread COVID but trust me, those assholes will figure out a way.

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منذ ٤ أيام
President Trump just demanded to see Twitter’s birth certificate.

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منذ ٥ أيام
My kids have started saying "Leave Meeting" when they want me to stop talking.

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منذ ٦ أيام
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منذ ٧ أيام
.@roryscovel is one of my favorite comics, and his hilarious new show "Robbie" is worth checking out between naps. https://t.co/AmxpaWq5dL

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منذ ٧ أيام
So, that’s what it’s like to wax the mold off an old potato. What'd everyone else get up to today?

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منذ ٨ أيام
Today, I overslept and completely missed my 2nd nap.

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منذ ٩ أيام
If there is a scandal involving Christina Applegate, what would they call it?

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منذ ١١ يومًا
I do believe that President Trump has been taking hydroxychloroquine. Since childhood.

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منذ ١٢ يومًا
Troubling thought: What if these are the good old days?

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منذ ١٣ يومًا
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منذ ١٤ يومًا
What I Googled in January: "Who directed 'Ford v Ferrari?'"
What I Googled in May: "Can Murder Wasps get Coronavirus?"

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منذ ١٥ يومًا
Every meditation app should be called, Hey Brain, STFU

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منذ ١٦ يومًا
Every day I count the trees in my yard and the number is never the same. Anyway I'm fine.

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منذ ١٦ يومًا
“Normal People” is about 2 horny Irish teens who choose to have sex instead of unnaturally suppressing those urges so they can go into comedy.

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منذ ١٧ يومًا
If Trump wins in November, will he blame everything on the first Trump administration?

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منذ ١٩ يومًا
Just went down a 4-hour YouTube rabbit hole, so "tip of the hat" to the Father of American Beekeeping: Lorenzo Langstroth.

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منذ ١٩ يومًا
Tonight I described a Freudian nightmare in which my dad knocks a hotdog out of my hand after a dropped fly-ball at Fenway Park. Never happened, but I’ll lie about my Dad any day to get a cool t-shirt from @SullysBrand. https://t.co/OzOE68vF9D https://t.co/gZK5AUSzDU

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